My husband and I have been faced with some major decisions in the last two weeks. On top of him being in the emergency medical field, he is also a very talented musician, who has been offered to lead worship at one church and play at two others. Wow! What a great opportunity you say!? The Lord is truly blessing your family and highlighting your husbands talent for greater use!? True....but.....a little back story on that...
We were VERY involved in a church for over 6 years. We helped get this church started from the ground up and we were forced to depart unexpectedly last July. My husband was the worship pastor and I lead on the leadership board. The church leaders were going one way and we did not agree with the direction the church was suddenly headed and instead of working through it with us, they said "see ya!" This was extremely painful and has left myself and my husband very bitter. We have tried to attend church, our daughter goes to Wednesday night church, but fear has such a hold on my heart, that these opportunities scare the crap out of me!
I have read Craig Groeschel's, Soul Detox, which was a great book on getting my heart in the right place, but I am still struggling. Two weeks ago, while I was lying in bed, I prayed to God and just let it go. I told Him that I cannot do this on my own and He is the only one who can lead us to a church. Please, just give us a sign! I am so tired of struggling. One week later my husband had an email asking him to lead worship at a church. One week after that, two more invitations to play. God is so good.
This situation is something that takes A LOT of prayer and faith in God, and trust in my relationship with my husband. He is extremely busy with work and music is another notch on his scheduling belt. I am a stay-at-home mom and I remember what it is like to have a husband involved in a church. It takes a huge sacrifice on our part. That is where the faith part comes in in. I need to trust that the Lord knows what He is doing and that He is going to take care of my family and provide us the church home that we have been looking for. The time constraints can be worked out, we need to follow our heart, face those fears, because God closed that door on the old church and he just opened THREE windows!!!!
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