Staying Grounded in Minnesota: You Wanna What?

This is going to be my newest reaction, to my cousin Sara, when she tells me she wants to have more kids.

"You wanna what!?!"

Why would this be my response? I have two kids of my own, I know! For the last 2 1/2 days I went from my normal two kids to four kids. I was watching Addison-9 months, Eli- 2 years 10 months, Natalie-5 years 11 months,

and Justin-7 years.

A little back story....I have struggled with wanting more kids, since we stopped having kids, so I jumped at the chance of being able to watch Addi and JC. I love kids! I love being a momma and in my mind, I always thought I wanted one more.

After we had Eli, Ross ended up having a vasectomy because my first pregnancy was so/so and my second one was much more difficult. Headaches, early contractions, trips to the hospital, lots of time on the couch. I could handle that with one kid but it wouldn't feel right being laid up on the couch when I had two other kids to care for.

Natalie

Eli

Yes...I had/asked/begged Ross to have the vasectomy. I was the one who was seeded and got to grow and carry those precious angels for nine months and then the icing on the three layer cake was pushing the bowling ball out of my yoo-hoo! I was almost positive Ross wouldn't mind a little soldering!!!!! Hey, I said no expletives....I still need to be me! Let me tell you friends...he wore that bag of peas like a champ!!

After the procedure I went through some major post-partum depression. Did we make the right decision? Was it too soon? Should we have waited? I gained a lot of weight and just felt horrible about myself. I wanted more, but I had so much. That is the difficult part of depression. I just wanted to be happy, but all I could do was cry. Fast forward to the present....a trip to the doctor, a low dose anti-depressant, healthier eating, stronger faith in God, and a true enjoyment in my kids has been the absolute cure for me!

Now to this weekend and why I just gave you that not-so-short back story. When Jason and Addison came, we were overjoyed! Two more kids to play with! Ross was working, so I sent him lots of pictures and gave that baby tons of kisses.

Let me tell you, if Natalie was anything like Addi as a baby, we probably would have skipped the big "V" and had 12 kids...NO LIE! She is the perfect baby!!! She doesn't cry, she barely fusses, she is an amazing eater, always smiling!!! Perfection! I told Ross it makes me want to have a third kid, his response "That's nice!" I texted my mother in law and told her the same thing, she laughed. The next morning I texted her again and said "JUST KIDDING!" After going through the night with a baby, no matter how adorable they are during the day...this woman likes her sleep. Babies just don't sleep like a 3 and 6 year old. I had forgotten that.

I am just in love with being in love. I am in love with being pregnant, no matter how sucky the pregnancy. I am in love with the whole process of labor and delivery. NO, I am not on drugs! My two kids were both born in under three hours with no drugs. The thought of having more kids is just not in the cards for my husband and I. I am a stay at home momma who loves the two that she has. It is what I can handle and I am starting a business. I have dreams now. Dreams for me that I never had before. I love (there's that word again) having kids that are growing up to be friends and becoming more independent. I love (yet, again) to be needed, but not so much.

In closing, Sara...I think you are nuts for wanting to have more kids, but I totally understand the desire and the love you have for children! It just isn't what I want anymore! Two is plenty, Four is a party!!!!

Check out some more pics from our weekend!