Top 10 Christmas Movies...For Kids!

In my house, the kids and I have been watching Christmas movies since July.  We love Curious George Christmas and nothing cools you down faster, on a hot August day, than Mickey Mouse trying to save the day before Christmas.

I consider myself, almost an expert on all things kid movies and this gave me the idea of compiling our first Top Ten Movie List!   Without further adieu....

Natalie and Eli's: Top Ten Christmas Movies

10. Barbie:A Perfect Christmas...Not my Choice :)
9. Prep and Landing

8. Mickey's Once Upon A Christmas
7. Mickey's Christmas Carol

6. The Polar Express

5. A Garfield Christmas...An Oldie but a Goodie!
4 .Curious George:A Very Monkey Christmas
3. How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Animated)

2. Frosty the Snowman and Frosty Returns
1. The Santa Clause...We Can't Get Enough of It!

Bacon Cheeseburger Soup

Did I just say bacon?  Did I just say cheese?  Um...yeah!

 

Trust me when I say, my husband is NOT a soup eater...until...I introduced him to my homemade, bacon cheeseburger soup!  Living in Minnesota and considering that is it -8 right now, and the ground is snow covered, I like to eat hot and hearty meals.  Chili gets a little old, so I needed a recipe to expand on.  I have shared my chili recipe, my enchiladas, and now for the soup!  Comfort food at its finest on this cold Sunday!!!

Introducing....

Bacon Cheeseburger Soup

1 Pound Ground Beef-Browned and Drained...Set Aside
4 Strips Bacon-Fried to Crispy and Crumbled...Set Aside

3 Medium Carrots...Peeled and Shredded...Hint...Food Processor!
2 Stalks Celery...Diced
1/2 Medium Onion...Chopped
1 teaspoon dried basil
1 teaspoon dried parsley

6 Large Potatoes...Diced
3 Cups Chicken Broth
6 Tablespoons Butter...Divided
3-5 Tablespoons All-Purpose Flour

1 1/2 Cups Velveeta
1/2 Cup Medium Sharp Cheddar...Shredded
Fresh Ground Pepper
Salt
1/4 Cup Sour Cream

It seems like a lot of ingredients, but trust me...they go together quickly! In a stockpot, brown the burger.  Drain and set aside.  Next fry up the bacon, until crispy.  Crumble and set aside.

In the same stockpot (we want all those great meat flavors!), you are going to melt 3 Tablespoons butter and sauté the carrots, celery, and onion.  Also add the basil and parsley.  Saute the veggies for roughly 10 minutes, until they are tender.

Add chicken broth, potatoes, bacon, and ground beef to the vegetable medley.  Bring to a boil, cover and simmer for 10-15 minutes.  You want the potatoes to be tender and soft!  No one wants to eat a semi-hard potato!

While the potatoes are cooking, in a small saucepan, melt the remaining 3 Tablespoons of butter.  Add equal parts flour.  Using a whisk, stir mixture for 3-5 minutes, until the flour mixture is smooth and bubbly.  Add this to the potato soup.

Stir.  Bring to boil and reduce heat to low.  Mixture will thicken.  Stir in the remaining ingredients (minus the sour cream).  Stir constantly until cheese is melted.  Add salt and pepper to taste.  Remove from heat.  Blend in the sour cream.

Serve with crackers, croutons, or fresh baked bread!
You will want to add this recipe to your winter-dinner rotation!!

Baked Caramel Corn

Looking for a new Christmas treat?  Something different for the next cookie exchange or gift for teacher?  I have been making this recipe since I was seven years old!  It is one of my family's favorites!  I only make it during the Christmas season, so it is an extra special treat!!!  Like most of my recipes, there are few ingredients and it is very simple to make.  I hope you enjoy our favorite Christmas-time goody!!

Baked Caramel Corn

6 Quarts Popped Popcorn-spread out on 2 cookie sheets, remove unpopped seeds

1 Cup Unsalted Butter
2 Cups Light Brown Sugar
1/2 Cup Light Corn Syrup
1 tsp Salt
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
1 tsp Vanilla

Preheat oven to 250 degrees.  While making caramel sauce, keep popped corn warm in preheated oven.

Melt butter.  Stir in brown sugar, corn syrup and salt.  Bring to a boil, stirring constantly.  Boil without stirring, on medium heat for five minutes.

Remove from heat.  Remove popcorn from oven.

Stir in baking soda and vanilla to caramel sauce.  Pour over corn and evenly coat.

Bake for 1 hour, stirring every 15 minutes.  Remove from pans immediately, once hour is up.  Enjoy!  Sprinkle in peanuts or M&M's to make it extra nummy :)

Struggling Through Depression::Baby Steps

Baby steps.  That is how I plan to get through this.

Baby steps.  One day at a time.

Baby steps.

Since I first posted about my struggles with depression, I have had a lot of time to just "think."  Tuesday was a really tough day for me and my husband came downstairs to a blubbering mess on the couch.  He asked the basic question of what's wrong?  What can I do?  What makes you so sad?  I had no answer.  I didn't know.  That is when I realized I needed some serious time to think and pray to Jesus.  The next question he asked...will you dance with me?  I of course declined.  Nope.  Would.Not.Do.  He swept me in his arms and as we moved back and forth to no music, he whispered in my ear "I will get you through this funk.  I love you too much not to."

I have so much to live for.  I have no reason to be depressed, but yet I am.  That is the crazy thing with depression.

Baby steps.

I called my grandma, who has suffered from depression since my grandpa died.  I needed to talk to someone who truly understood.  She told me some great advice...
-do something for me.  Not something that is best for the kids or my husband.
-what makes Marianne happy.  Even if it is only ten minutes.
-yoga? crosswords?
-pray baby girl

Baby steps.

Yesterday morning I received the most loving email from Ross' grandpa.  He told me this, "Grandma and I sincerely love you and respect the person you are...You are a capable wife and mom.  You are experiencing the process all of us go through for God to mold us into the person He created us to be.  It is not a comfortable process, but a good one...I urge you to yield yourself to him and allow Him to have His way in your life.  His is always the best.  We think we can work things out, but He is better at working things into our lives."  Cue the tears.  What an amazing reminder.

Baby steps.

Here it is, now Friday.  I have had some great conversations and time to contemplate my situation, my life, my family and what I need to get through this struggle.  Depression is tough but it doesn't have to be forever.  This is what I have come up with for my baby steps:

-Pray.  I may not be involved in a church right now, but that does not change my faith in God.  When I pray, I am at peace.
-Cook.  I find joy in cooking.  I find joy in providing.
-Reading.  I love to read and this is something I would like to do more of.
-Treat myself to a hot bath.  Simple, yes!
-Surround myself with positive people who want to better my life and my situation.  Steer clear of the negativity and what makes me angry.
-Light a candle.
-Breathe.

Baby steps.

Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas

These cold Minnesota days, cause me to crave the food heavy-laden with cheese and gooey-ness!  Introducing....Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas...the epitome of all things cheesy and gooey!

I want to put a disclaimer on my recipes.  I cook for comfort.  I cook for cravings.  My recipes contain meat.  They contain fat.  They contain butter and cheese.  They may even contain some whiskey.  I love to cook and even more, I love to eat what I cook!  This is not a place to find healthy or light recipes...possibly down the road when I am 10 pounds heavier and 10 years older :)

The origination for these enchiladas is actually Colorado.  Ross' uncle Paul made these for us when we visited him, back during our college days.  We loved them so much, they have been on our permanent menu rotation ever since!

Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas

Ingredients:
4 Chicken Breasts, Thawed and Boiled in Water

8 oz. Cream Cheese, Softened
1 Cup Sour Cream
1 Small Can Diced Green Chiles
1 Small Onion, Chopped and Sauteed in Butter
Cayenne Pepper, Salt, and Tobasco to Taste

5-7 Buritto Size Flour Tortillas
1 Pound Grated Mozzarella Cheese
1/2 Cup Liquid Whipping Cream

Once chicken has been fully cooked in boiling water, shred meat.  
I found a super easy way of doing this with your KitchenAid!  Pop it in the bowl and mix it up! 

In separate bowl, combine cream cheese, sour cream, green chiles, onion, and spices.  Add chicken.  Mix.

Take filling and spread down middle of tortilla.  Fold tortilla over, lay seam side down in 9x13 pan.  Repeat.  Sprinkle enchiladas with mozzarella and pour whipping cream over top.

Bake in 350 degree oven for 30 minutes or until enchiladas are bubbly and browning on top.  

Serve with salsa.

The Perfect Tree

The day had arrived!  It was time for our annual trip to Rudolph's Tree Farm.  Luckily, it wasn't too cold out, so we loaded up the truck and headed out to find the "perfect tree!"  In my husbands mind, he thinks like the Griswolds', in National Lampoons Christmas Vacation.  Does the perfect tree exist?  When I think Christmas trees, I think the tree from Charlie Brown Christmas is perfect!  I grew up with a fake tree, so switching over to a real tree when we got married was a bit of a compromise.  I have to admit, now I can't imagine not having the smell of fresh pine spread throughout my house!

The "scope out" begins...

Which tree should we pick?

Eli thinks this one!

Too Small...Let's Keep Looking Kids!

As you can see, the perfect tree was finally acquired and cut!

She really wasn't the "perfect" tree, there are some large gaps between branches and she is missing some branches at the top, but that is why I feel in love with it!  I have a heart for broken things.  Things that need a home.  That is why we got our dog from a shelter.  She needed us...just like this tree!  Check out the final product below...400 lights and lots of ornaments later, our tree is...Perfect!

Struggling through Depression

I'm going to be honest.  The last couple of weeks have been difficult.  Blame the holidays.  Blame the pms.  I know it is so much more than that.  It is a funk that won't go away and a gray cloud that doesn't lift.

Since I had my second child three years ago, I started to receive treatment for depression.  I knew something was wrong, when I had this perfect baby boy, but I had no joy in him.  The tears would flow and the bouts of happiness were few and far between.  The medication has helped but I have hit that low spot again.  The spot with the tears and the sadness and the need for sleep.  I need to share something.  This may sound stupid, but it makes sense to me.  Being depressed, depresses me.  I am typically a very happy and optimistic person, who finds joy in crap like sunbeams and raindrops.  Right now I feel burly and I want to growl at you.  Complete opposite?  I would say so.

I have heard it all.  I know what I should be doing to get better.  Exercise, eating right, trying to find happiness in the simple things, exposing yourself to other people.  First of all...have you ever been depressed?  Then you know how DIFFICULT all of these things are.  Getting out of bed and off the couch is a struggle.  Daily tasks are a struggle.  Being social?  Please...next to impossible.  There is a sense of failure and a lack of motivation.  I feel as if I have failed my husband and my kids, when I have done nothing to generate those feelings from them.  My heart knows that.  My head doesn't.

I have faith and trust in my Lord Jesus Christ.  I do not trust the foundation of the church...sad to say.  A rough split will do that to you.  The friends that I have are fabulous, but I am not openly seeking new friends or a book club.  I would rather be myself.  I work better alone.  This doesn't make me sad.  It is just easier for me.  That is why I work from home.  That is why I blog.  I like the quiet.

Can you understand this?  Do any of you feel like this?  Let me know that I am not alone.  We are in this together.  I understand you.  I understand your tears.  You don't need to explain them to me.  Depression is hard, it is a struggle, I want to win the battle.  I plan on winning the battle.  How?  I am going to be honest with myself.  I'm going to pray.  I am going to have those tough conversations with my husband and keep open communication.  I am going to take my meds and not be ashamed of that.  I am going to love me for me.  That is all I can do.  How do you fight the struggle?

Marianne

Holidays=Drinking

Why is it, the holidays make me want to drink?  In excess?

Good question?  It must be, since it is past my bedtime and that is what I am pondering at this late hour of 9:14 p.m.

It's interesting.  What you say?  The holidays.  I love Christmas.  I love the movies, the baking, the time with my kids, the snow, and the magical feeling that comes along with it.  I don't really care for the hustle and bustle though.  Thanksgiving  is ok.  Halloween is for the kids.  I picture the meme of Santa saying, "Calm the F*$@! Down.  It's Only October!"  Well, now it is November and in a couple of days, it will be December.

Don't take this rambling the wrong way.  My immediate family is a sweet side of fabulous, but when you put us all together...cue the dysfunction.  As with any family, there are topics you CANNOT talk about...politics for sure (half are democrats, the other half republicans), gun control, stay away from religion, family "hot" topics.  What does that leave?  The kids in college with their vicarious experiences, stories about the children, the WEATHER, business, latest "fad" movies, the cousin who loves to talk about herself....

I am sure some of you will read this and think that we aren't that bad, my family will take offense and have feelings hurt.  Well, I have news for you.  This isn't your blog :)!

Let me put it this way.  My mom and my favorite movie to watch before Thanksgiving is "Home for the Holidays."

Have you seen it?  If not, you need to!  Now this movie is Robert Downey Jr. PRE-PRE-PRE Iron Man trilogy.  Mom and I tend to pick out which character in the movie symbolizes us. My favorite is the old aunt with the fruit loops necklace.

So, here I am on the Eve of Thanksgiving Eve with no fingernails (I chewed them off) and dreaming of my bottle of whipped cream Vodka

and being tipsy by noon!  It's the best way to bake you know...half in the bag :)

While the children are coloring turkeys, I will be sipping Creamsicles and thinking that in a mere 28 days it will all be over!

Happy Thanksgiving, from my family to yours!

P.S.  To all you mommas....here is my recipe for Creamsicles....

All you need is:

Ice
Whipped Cream Vodka
Sprite or Sierra Mist
Orange Juice

I do 1/3 of each beverage.  Mix it to your specific tastes.  Trust me, you can't even taste the vodka.  This is a great party drink.  Enjoy!

Thankfulness Times 30!!!

There are 30 days in November and since November also carries the holiday of Thanksgiving and massive gluttony, I thought I would write about the thirty things that I am most thankful for.  I am going for the non-traditional here.  Let's start with the basics and move on from there.  I am thankful for:

1. My husband of 8 years.  My marriage.  The need I feel for him still after 13 years together.  Without him I am nothing.  He is my rock, my paper, and my scissors.

2.  My kids.  I always wanted kids.  I have been blessed with the two most loving and accepting kids. They love me through my mean-mommy days and they love me through my best days.  They make me want to have more good days than bad.  I never thought I could love anyone so much, and then I had TWO kids.  They amaze me.

3.  My dog, Cinder.  We rescued her a year ago from a shelter and she has been a part of this family ever since.  We are not the Benzens without her.  Cinder has turned my husband into a dog lover, so much so, we had our Christmas pictures taken with her.  She completes our entire family.  The acceptance of a dog is like nothing I have ever seen.  She knows when I need a snuggle and she knows when to get out of my way.  Mostly, I just want to snuggle her.

4.  Candy Crush.  Hell to the Yeah.

5.  A good book.  I am on the third Hunger Games book and I don't get a ton of time to read, so when I can't put it down...you know it is fabulous!  I love to read.  I love books.  The smell, the sound they make when you open them, the turning of pages.  So thankful for books.

6.  Magazines.  I subscribe to six or seven magazines.  Some for me, some for the kids, some for the business.  Yes, I have an iPad, but there is something about the tangible.  I love that.  I love the simple things still.  A magazine, writing a letter to my grandma, putting in a disc in the DVD player....consider me old school 32.

7.  My home.  We live in an older, stucco home and she is SOLID.  I generate safety from my house and "she" truly is a home.

8.  Mr. and Mrs. Darwin Nelson.  They started out as teachers back in High School, but I can honestly say that they are truly friends.  Friends that the kids consider "GandG Nelson."  Friends that I can call on when I have a question about business or life.  They are friends, but more so, they are family.  We love them.  So thankful for the Nelsons.  So thankful.

9.  Snow!  I love winter, I love the snow...but I hate to be cold.  Let me repeat this...I HATE to be cold!  I LOVE the snow though!  It is so beautiful.  One of the true gifts from God.

10.  My brother and sister.  Older and Younger and I am stuck in the Middle.  I have learned so much from both of them.  Very thankful for my siblings.

11.  Chocolate and Coffee and Carbs and Chips and Ice Cream...I am so thankful for FOOD!  I love to eat!

12.  Thankful for the passion to cook and being blessed with the ability to be fairly good at it.  There is no greater joy than providing for your family through food....andy my bestest friend Josh....

13.  I am a stay at home mom.  Everyday I get to do what I love.

14.  My husband has two jobs.  One full time and one part time and I guess you could consider the on-call one too!  Blessed and thankful for employment!

15.  HALF WAY!

16.  Technology.  I love TV, Movies, my computer, iPad, the kids Leap Pads...I know when to turn it off, but it is so nice to have.

17.  Heat.  This time of year it is the little things to be truly thankful for.  My family has so much when others have so little.  I am thankful for never being cold or hungry.

18.  Finances.  My husband and I have finally gotten a "strong-hold" over our finances over 8 years of marriage.  No better feeling.  No credit card debt and the truck is almost paid off.  To finally have control is an amazing feeling.  It took a change in attitude, but I am so thankful that we are finally there and we did it together!

19.  My mom and dad.  What would life be like without my mom and dad?  So boring.  We have weekly meals together, they are so amazingly awesome to my kids and they have never questioned it when we needed help.  My mom and dad are such a gift to my family and they bring us all absolute joy.  Trust me, never a dull moment when we are all together!

20.  Reliable vehicles.

21.  Having a husband who is blessed with the gift of song.  He is so amazingly talented and I am thankful that every day I get to hear that gift.  You are missing out if you haven't heard him sing.  I am very biased :)

22.  A college education.  Yes, I am a stay at home mom, but my time at Bethel has and never will be wasted.  I have a love for learning that can never be extinguished.

23.  My in-laws.  Always accepting and loving to myself and my family.

24.  Faith.  I have a faith in God that will not waver, no matter what the circumstances.

25.  Friends.  True friends that have stuck by me through everything.  I am very guarded and choosy with who I let in my life, so to have this select few that has stuck with me, by my side...is such an amazing gift.

26.  CindyBlue Designs.  What would I do without my small business?

27.  My grandma.  There is nothing I can say that I have not already said about her.  Such a truly fantastic woman, with undeniable class and grace.

28.  My grandpa.  He was taken too soon, but the memories I have of him live inside.  So thankful for the memories.

29.  Rainy Lake.   Where the memories start and where the memories will end.

30.  Passion.  Passion for photography.  Passion for love.  Passion for everything I do.  Passion that gets me through.

Marianne

Our New Normal? Life as a SWAT Family.

Friday was the day.  The text came in.  Possible call out tonight.  What does that mean for me?  Instant panic attack!  My heart rate increased, I had rapid breathing and sweaty palms.  Is this what it's like to be married to someone on a Special Response Team (SRT)?

I didn't really know what to expect when my husband would be called out for the first time.  It is a waiting game.  Waiting for the warrant to be signed.  Waiting for the word "go."  To anyone else, this may not seem like a big deal.  Family caught word that there may be a "call out" and all they could say was "it's gonna be so awesome!"  After that, all I heard was guns and blah, blah, blah....  People forget that this is my life.  My husband is not just a man on SRT or a dispatcher, firefighter, or EMT...he is my husband and the father of my children.

Forget awesome.  You just said guns and awesome in the same sentence.  Thats all I heard.

My brother-in-law is a cop.  He has trained for everything my husband is doing.  My husband is a medic for SRT.  He is not a gun slinging, handcuff handling, taser wielding police officer.  He is a bandaid bearing, emergency kit carrying and blood clotting professional....who has to wear a bullet proof vest.  I trust the men who are covering him.  I trust the training that my husband received at Camp Ripley and trust that God will protect the men when the call does come out.  What I do not trust is the unknown.  The not knowing factor and the unpredictability of others.

So the next time you want to talk me and IN FRONT of my kids about how awesome it is.  Think twice.  I support my husband 100% in everything he does.  I love his passion and live for that.  The support doesn't remove the fear.  This is something I am learning.  When he was a worship pastor at a church, you didn't really have to worry about any of these issues.  As time goes on it will get easier.  I am excited for the experiences that will be presented to my husband but I am still a wary wife who has a lot to learn about trust, faith, and remembering always who is in control.

Road-Trippin

Two weeks ago, I was lucky enough to road trip from Minnesota to Colorado with my sister-in-law, Nora and my best-guy-friend, Josh.  This was a HUGE adventure for me!  I had never left my husband or my children by myself before, but I did it, and it was AWESOME!

I had been to Colorado once before to visit family but that was before Ross and I were even married.  The mountains did not disappoint...absolute beauty!  My good friends, Nancy and Gary, own a mountain home in Crystal Lakes, about one hour from Fort Collins, and the views are something I will never forget!

We enjoyed hiking, watching snow move across the mountains, fireplaces and wine, catching up on some reading, lots of laughs, "neat" nature, and an interesting flight home.  Looking forward to my next trip away, hopefully it doesn't take me another 8 years to leave my husband and kids!

Check out some of my pictures!